Our new home

Okay not really, but when we were out in the hills in Battle Mountain we were joking about the old remains of foundations and trailers being our new home. Xiana asked, "this our home mommy?" We found a fridge and 3 beds and convinced the girls that we were all set. We had a fabulous time exploring and the weather was beautiful (even if I did request that we head back to Reno early to beat the storm).
There were two buildings too which makes us rich homeowners. I love being in the mountains and it was really nice for the girls to get to run around and check stuff out.
We were posing on the threshold of our house.

And apparently we also inherited a tractor... we are so fortunate!

Of course now we have to get homeowners insurance to compensate for our loss after the tractor ate my soon-to-be-husband.
The girls traipsed around the foundations discovering a world of treasures along the way. Ekco was even able to point out a few animal tracks and accurately ascribe them.
The old Winnebago was a bit much but.... still neat!
There were several mining shafts and it was really interesting to pick Brian's brain about what everything was, how it was used, what the mines do now (he used to work in a mine).

Brian and his girls.... I hope he gets a boy some day :)
Sack of potatoes!
There is something so dramatic about old buildings. They evoke such a feeling of what was. To think that at one time, this was a running, working mine. Who knows the kinds of experiences that happened right here. So much life for a now lifeless building.
More exploring. The hole in the wall looks like the play boy bunny (Brian pointed this out), but he's right!
Brian found some gold specks in the mountains and helped me and the girls see them.
We also found a cave and ventured inside.


And of course, because we were in the mountains, Xiana got to drive. A trip in the mountains wouldn't be complete without it. She always tells me how she and Brian drive in the mountains and mommy drives on the streets.
They really are beautiful. I tried to take several shots to do a panorama. I think I will be able to put them together after I print them. I love how the lines of snow act as both shading and outline for all the ridges. It makes the mountains breathtaking.
This is Brian's favorite mountain in Nevada... I can see why!
I had to get a picture of Xiana and I in our matching camo (Christmas gifts from Brian).
And I also insisted on our regular Sunday picture in front of the tree. Every time we have gone to church in Battle Mountain I have insisted on a pic in front of this tree. We are getting quite the stock.

Friends

Xiana, like her mother, needs friends. She is not a content-to-sit-around by herself type of a girl. And that works for us because neither am I. We have been fortunate enough to be involved with several play groups and she is the lucky recipient of a whole bunch of cousins. My cousin comes through Sparks pretty regularly and she loves to play with his kids.
This week we went to Coconut bowl and she got to run around with all of her friends in the jungle gym.
Even when she was a tiny baby, she was always more calm when we had company. It's strange that she could be hard-wired that way.
She has mastered the slide and can slow herself down at the bottom as well as climb up to the top all by herself. These slides are not to be taken lightly either... they're fast!
Xiana is a sweet girl who has embraced the terrible two's. I often wonder what on earth happened to my sweet, obedient child. Then I catch glimpses of her in the early morning and in the evening before bed and I am reminded that she is still there beneath the sassy defiance. I have to regularly reassure myself that this phase will not last forever. Still, in her defense, the world is suddenly changing around her and she is trying to make sense of it all. I have been explaining to her that Brian will be her daddy and she refers to him as such about half the time. Last week when it was only about 10% of the time, we met with a photographer and she announced, "Brian my daddy." So she definitely gets it. We spent the weekend in Battle Mountain with Brian's daughter Ekco (post coming soon) and this week our conversation went like this: Xiana: Where Ekco?
Me: Where is she?
X: At her mommy house
M: that's right
X: Where Kylee? (her new cousin)
M: Where is she?
X: At her mommy house
M: That's right.
X: Where Xiana?
M: Where is Xiana?
X: ummm, at her mommy house! And where daddy?
M: at work
X: no! daddy at Kevin house (Brian's brother who just moved in with him)
Like I said, there are a lot of changes taking place and she is trying to make sense of them all. I then tried to explain to her that she was going to live with her mommy and daddy in a few months after we get married. She definitely does not believe me yet. Still, every night when we leave Brian's she cries that she wants to stay at his house so that is certainly a step in the right direction. There are so many confusions in her life that I never dreamed of when I was a kid. Nevertheless, I am not rushing headlong to her defense because part of the attitude is just plain toddler years.
She continues to be very sharp and picks up on everything.

• The other day I was in the mirror and she came to me and asked, "you picking zits mom?"

• At a sporting goods store in town there is a statue of Abraham Lincoln. A long time ago I told her that grandpa really liked him. Last time we went she asked, "who that guy mommy?" "that is Abraham Lincoln, the 16th president of the country" "oh, and grandpa like him!"

• I regularly say, "shut your mouth" as in, "no way!" and on her phone I overheard her say, "shut you mouth Alicia!" I need to be more careful.

• She also, mimicking Brian said, "you don't tell me."

• Yesterday when we were driving to Brian's house she said, "sun in my eyes mommy, move it" I told her that I couldn't move the sun silly and then she ducked her head down exclaiming, "I did it! I move the sun!"

• On our way back from Battle Mountain I broke the DVD player and I was super annoyed. She reassured me, "mommy let me fix it" after I told her it could not be fixed.

Sledding take 2

We went sledding at our original spot, but this time it was treacherous. The day started with us sledding down the first hill to get to the slope. Last time it was a nice little ride (we were the first ones there) that helped alleviate some of the carrying and walking. This time, it was a little intimidating as it had been packed down and some people were opting to just sled there instead of walking to the slope. I tried to determine which side would be safest and after watching Brian lose Ella, barely holding her by her ankles while her head dragged on the ground, I opted to follow Kevin's path on the other side. Unfortunately, I couldn't see that there were giant wooden posts sticking out of the ground on the other side. So, I put Xiana on my lap and we slid down the hill. Just as we were going over the second hump I looked up in time to hear someone yell, "watch out" and see Brian running at top speed towards us. Honestly, it happened so fast I didn't even have the foresight to try to stop us. Just before slamming into the posts, Brian threw his whole body weight in front of us and stopped us like a tank *thud* That was the first of several painful experiences for Brian. A lady passing by exclaimed, "oh my gosh he saved you," and several people cheered. He really did save us. We would have been in a world of hurt had he not stopped us... instead he was in a world of hurt.
The kids would have been content to just sit in the truck and eat snow all day.
We got to the actual sledding runs and life didn't get much better. Because of the multitude of peeps sledding down the slopes, it was icy and frightening. Some lame snow boarders decided that the sledding hill would be a great spot to build a giant jump... not a good idea. When we got to the top we all looked down in dismay, nobody venturing to go first. Until... of course Brian hopped on for a trial run. He said he would be the Guinea pig... after all, he has insurance (I think this is somewhat faulty logic, but whatever). He went down and hit the first jump *boom* flew into the air but managed to hold on to his tube for a few seconds until *wham* he nailed the second and more significant jump. All I could see was body parts, glasses, hat, and tube flying up in the air in a discombobulated heap. It took a moment to identify limbs from rope and I thought he would certainly step on his glasses buried in the snow behind him. He must have flown 10 feet in the air. He said he could hear everybody groaning and laughing except me... he could hear me screaming. I told him that just shows who loves him most :) Without passing go or collecting 200 dollars he immediately began kicking down the jump. Somebody was seriously going to get killed on that thing. Meanwhile, I took Xiana down to the other side and sledded down a very tame hill. It wasn't nearly as much fun as the big slope; however, we did make it out alive and injury-free. After Brian broke down the jump, I went down by myself several times and it was thrilling. Still, with Xiana on my lap I never ventured to the very top, instead opting to walk part way down and then start at a manageable spot. We did have a good time, but it was precarious at best. Mark took his kids down several runs and mastered the ability to hold them tight. He and Brian raced each other a few times resulting in duo-wipe outs.
My friend Deborah flew in from Vegas that day. It was great to talk on the way up and drink hot chocolate on the way down.
While being dragged back to the car, Xiana fell asleep... just like this. I guess you can't argue with nap time.

Going and Going and Going

We had a pretty wild week after Christmas moving into the new year. Brian had family in town and my dear friend Deborah came out for the weekend. We went bowling... Ali played with the kids like crazy.
Xiana started to try to comprehend this new world of cousins and aunts and uncles. One morning I was explaining to her that Brian's siblings would be aunt so-and-so and uncle so-and-so and she said, "and uncle Brian!" To which I replied, "no, silly, he'll be daddy." She pondered this for a moment before responding, "what grandpa name gonna be?" I attempted to help her understand that grandpa's name would not be changing, but she didn't believe me. And this makes sense because in her experience, there is no explanation for grandpa aside from dad. She understands that grandma is my mom, because she has a mom. But grandpa kind of eludes her. When I call him dad she gets confused and I guess has determined that grandpa must be both that and dad. So when I tried to explain that Brian would be dad, it suddenly filled an already ascribed slot. Clever little girl. It's cute to see how her mind works.
She adores her new cousins... all of them!

We had a meeting of the parents for dinner (which went off splendidly if I do say so myself.... not that I had any doubts). The kids went wild. It's really fun for Xiana to now have cousins her age. My nieces and nephews are mostly older than her (not that she minds at all... in fact, she loves playing with the older girls and all her cousins are wonderful with her). Still, it has been fun for her to have kids her age to play with. It will be great to watch them all grow up together.

My dad and (it seriously just now occurred to me) father-in-law... crazy! The dinner was really nice and it was fun to have both sets of parents meet.
The girls had fun playing together as well. Xiana also does not quite understand the whole sister concept. When I tell her that Ekco is going to be her sister she gets mad and insists that she is Ekco, not sister. What a confusing world.... but a loving one! Still, the concept must have crept in a bit because every time Xiana eats now she always puts some aside and tells me, "I save this for Ekco." She has never done that before and she does it multiple times daily so she must at least grasp that Ecko is a special kind of relation to her.
Xiana continues to absorb everything and anything that anybody says. It only takes once. Ekco accidentally taught her, "guess what? chicken butt." after only saying it one time. At story time the librarian asked the kids (referring to the story) and guess what? Xiana bellowed, "chicken butt!" It was really hard not to laugh. One of my regular figures of speech is, "shut your mouth" as in, no way, I can't believe it. The other day Xiana was using her chicken nugget as a phone when I heard her say, "shut you mouth alicia!" It was also hysterical and hard not to laugh. I had a head ache one evening and announced, "I am going to take some ib profin." The next morning she asked me, "you're head hurt? You need profin?" Nothing gets past her! The other morning she exclaimed, "shooot! I forgot my bib!" Later when I was doing her hair I said, "we better get it wet to get rid of the fly aways. She thought for a moment and then said, "mommy, you tell me there flies in my hair?" One day the computer was going really slow and she quite seriously told me, "have to get a new puter." Last night after family home evening she insisted that EVERYBODY in the house had to say prayers with her.... but not out in the living room... we ALL had to come into her bedroom (including Garrett). She also insisted that Garrett participate in singing "Jesus wants me for a sunbeam" and in FHE prayer. She certainly has him wrapped around her little finger. He goes "shopping" with her all day and plays so sweetly with her. One of her new favorite past times is to get her purse (one of many) and go shopping. She often brings her shopping cart, or just her shopping baskets, or one of her strollers depending on if her babies are going to go with her. Then she kisses me goodbye and waves bye for a few and then gets groceries and brings them back home. As a result, there is food and dishes spread from one end of the house to the other at any given time. Another of her favorite games is to play on beds. At home she loves nothing more than to jump on grandma and grandpa's bed, and at Brian's we rarely leave without her convincing Brian to "play on mommy's bed." Life is good.

Brian's Birthday

ended up being far more exciting for me than for him. I surprised him with a green cake and an ipod touch... he surprised me with a diamond ring. Sounds about right. We had dinner at my parent's house made by my fabulous gourmet chef mom. It was really great that Ekco got to be here for her pop's birthday extravaganza featuring (drum roll please) family. Fun. Fun. Fun.
He's getting pretty old, the girls needed to assist him in extinguishing the flames.
Pretty exciting stuff this Christmas, birthday, engagement....

Christmas aftermath

Xiana practicing her bike skills...
Beep beep!
Brian got us matching camo outfits... seriously adorable. Who would have thunk it?

Rose colored glasses (those with week stomachs might consider skipping this post)

So this is what it feels like to be engaged. I can't lie and say I've always wondered... because I haven't. I am one of those rare girls that never thought about my wedding ring. I never looked at bridal magazines. I never cut out pictures of wedding gowns and pasted them in a book to refer to when the time came. No. I pretty much never thought about a wedding. I knew that I would get married in my life, but the wedding part never really mattered much to me. I always felt that when people got engaged it was a necessary and inevitable step towards their union... not much else. I assumed that it didn't change anything to be engaged. It feels like to me, that I was wrong. Because suddenly things feel subtly different amounting to magnanimous change. When Brian proposed and put the ring that he designed on my finger, suddenly, and without warning, the ring that I had never even considered became vastly important. I mean like really really important...crucial even. And this ring (the one that HE designed) immediately became the ring of my dreams, the ring that I had always wanted, the perfect, most fabulous ring. And it's funny because when we went and looked at rings the sales clerk asked, "are you finding your dream ring?" and I had to admit that, no, I was not finding it because I simply did not have one. And yet, Brian placed my dream ring on my finger late Sat. night. And rest assured. It is my dream ring. It embodies him and me and us and I. love. it. (almost as much as I love him teehee) Lest you think I am materialistic and obsessed with a ring, let me now attempt to explain the other differences between pre-engaged and post-engaged. There are many. Let me just start by saying I have known for a while that I was going to marry him some day (like think 3rd date) it was mainly a matter of convincing him. (And don't think for a second that a reoccurring statement in our relationship didn't consist of me explaining to him that I'm not sure he realizes yet how completely awesome I am, because it did!) Plus, we have been talking marriage for several months now so his proposal shouldn't have surprised me like it did. And you'd think that not much would change since marriage has been the dialogue between us for a while and I have felt certain that we were companions-to-be. Yet. it feels different. It's a distinct yet almost imperceptible feeling. Like somebody took the magic wedding wand and tapped me over the head with it. Because instantaneously I felt a deeper connection to Brian and I felt more like a team than I ever have before. This is strange because I have felt like we are a team for a long time. I have felt like we are one. But now... it's like we are one. And we're not even married yet. In my heart and mind I just feel like we are these two people that are joined forever (which we will be, but we're not yet and still I feel like we are). And I didn't think it was possible to feel more comfortable with him than I already do because we have always been very comfortable and yet, suddenly, when I look at him, it feels like home. And it is home. And I feel like the luckiest girl alive. I'm sure all soon-to-be-brides feel that way, but it's hard to believe that anybody else has ever felt like this before. But I'll believe it because I also never thought I would feel like this. He spent his birthday at my parents house and some of his siblings came over, and his daughter is here with him. As we sat around the tree singing, it felt so right and I felt so safe. I can't say that I've ever felt particularly unsafe, but having him by my side with this ring on my hand provides a sense of security that I never even knew was missing; that I never even knew I wanted. But I must, because it is a wonderful feeling. All at once I inherited a much bigger family. And I like his family. All of them. And in my head I've known that they would be my family too. But like everything else, it feels different now. Because now it's official and they are my family. And I feel closer to them too. Just. like. that. Weird huh? And I hope that the flutters I get in my stomach every time I see his face will never go away. I know. You can say it. Throw up already right? But it's true. And I hope that everybody in the whole world has either felt or will feel this some day in their lives. Because it is the most amazing feeling. And the world looks different somehow when you feel like this; easier; brighter; safer; more beautiful.

These pictures don't begin to do this ring justice, but at least you get the idea.

Christmas!

Christmas morning Xiana came out to see what Santa had brought her. She discovered candy and toys and books in her stocking. One book was an Elmo counting book. She picked it up and said, "yook mommy a counting book!" It was like she was reading I swear.... the numbers on the cover must have been her tip off.
Last year she didn't really have the hang of opening presents. This year, she has it down to an art. She enjoyed opening all her gifts from Santa and her one gift from mommy. Actually (and I probably shouldn't admit this) her Santa gifts this year came from all her friends. At her birthday party she got such an immense overload of gifts that I re wrapped about 15 of them in Christmas paper and wrote "from Santa." So many thanks to all of you who unknowingly provided my Santa gifts. She was thrilled with all of them.... again!
I'll give you one guess as to who bought her this little camo outfit... I received a matching vest. As far as camouflage goes, they are quite cute with hot pink embellishment.
Bedtime for Francis is a Frey family favorite and I did not have a copy. My sister, Cami, somehow managed to find the one gift Xiana actually needed this year :)
I made my parents a calender with pics from the year. Here they are admiring it. The coolest part is that I got to put little pictures on the days of the month for every child/grandchild/in-law 's birthdays.
Garrett had something of a guitar disaster earlier in the year so he was thrilled to have a replacement.
I am always on the lookout for cute black baby dolls. They are few and far between. My parents found one at Costco and bought it for her. She is a beautiful little baby. My only complaint is that she has straight hair! Oh well, baby steps right?
The one gift I got her is this bike.
Which she can barely pedal, but again, baby steps. She likes to be pushed around on it and at least her feet touch the pedals which is a step in the right direction.
It was a beautiful Christmas this year, like always. There is nothing like having a little one to remind you how joyful and FUN Christmas it!

Christmas Eve

On Christmas Eve, Xiana and I went over to Kacie's so that Xiana could get her annual spoiling. Kacie is crazy! Yes, crazy! She has single handedly kept Xiana in toys and clothes pretty much since birth. This year was no different. She managed to find the single most perfect gift for Xiana this Christmas... all of the Sesame Street characters. Xiana loves Sesame Street. Every morning when she wakes she asks, "watch Elmo today?" and then as soon as it's over she states, "I watch Elmo again tomorrow." So, needless to say she LOVED her gift. The only problem is that she has little concept of stuffed animals that don't do anything. She keeps bringing me her friends saying, "push buttons, make Elmo sing." When I explain to her that these are toys and she needs to use her imagination because they don't do anything she says, "okay, make Abby sing?" It's quite comical. Poor baby has no understanding of toys that don't make noise.
While we were driving to Kacie's house Xiana yelled out the window, "happy Halloween!"
She later revised to, "happy holidays!"
Here she is with her new posse.

After we left Kacie's house (with about six pounds of fudge) we went to see the Frog and the Princess. This is only the second movie I have ever taken Xiana to and it is her first princess movie. She has been so excited about it telling anyone who would listen that she was going to see it. She kept telling me that there were two princesses which I didn't understand until we saw it. She must have seen a preview somewhere. Anyway, I love that this is her first princess movie for several reasons. First, it is the first black Disney princess (it's about time!), second, the princess's name is Tiana.... closely resembling Xiana, and third, Tiana is a hard working waitress! Xiana was enraptured the entire time (well except for the 15 minute nap she took). The music was fantastic really capturing the heart of New Orleans and Xiana snapped her fingers, stomped her feet, and shook her little booty to the music. It was kind of scary at parts containing voodoo black magic, but she never got scared. Only later when I overheard her telling her friend that it was, "kinda scary" did I realize that she understood the shadow monsters. All in all, it was spectacular. I'm so glad this was her very first princess movie! Later that evening we acted out the Christmas story with the nativity set (which she somewhat listened to). At the very least she understood that the angel came to tell the shepherds of Christ's arrival because she was "flying" around with a trumpet in her mouth. Another thing she certainly got this year was that it is Jesus' birthday. Several times throughout the season I have overheard her singing Happy Birthday to Jesus. Garrett has a tradition of watching Muppet Christmas so we all piled on to my parents bed and watched it. For once Garrett found someone who appreciated the movie as much as he did. Right before bed I told Xiana that Santa would be bringing her presents and filling her stocking while she slept. She didn't like the idea of that at all. Santa is still kind of scary to her and she said, "he'll hurt me." I reassured her that he was very nice and he would not hurt her, but she stuck to her guns repeating that he would hurt her. I guess it makes sense to be afraid of a big strange man coming into your house while you sleep. Still, reaping the rewards of that scary man the following day might have helped alleviate some of her fears.